Chelsea's Amazing Cats Variety Show!
by Kassoro
Summary: This is what happens when Kassoro gets bored with her current fic ffor a while and decides to make all those poor cats do things. Like put on a Best of Broadway Variety Show! Tehee..... CHAPTER ONE IS COMPLETE Please R


Author's Note So I decided to direct a Variety show......with the Cats of CATS. It's mostly gonna be my fav Broadway songs. Slightly weird, but okay. I put Misto and Quaxo as two different people. Let us ride to CAMELOT!!

"Okay everyone!! Auditions begin in 5 minutes!!" Chelsea yelled at the top of her lungs to get through to the Cats, all of whom were practicing songs or dances (or both). Quaxo was playing "Starmites" on the piano with Mungojerrie, Pouncival, and Alonzo all singing along in 3 part harmony. Misto and Rumpleteazer were practicing their duet, "Only You". Bombalurina and Demeter were going over dance steps for "All That Jazz". The Rum Tum Tugger was singing........his theme song and trying to persuade some of the kittens to join in. They refused, being they were also rehearsing their auditions (Electra singing "I Am Electric", Jemima singing "Castle on a Cloud", Victoria singing "A Pharaoh's Story", and Etcetera singing "I Am A Crazed Psychotic Fangirl And Proud Of It"(an original piece)). Plato and Tumblebrutus were arguing over who would get to be Javert in "The Confrontation". Admetus was belting (rather loudly) "How to succeed". Everyone not previously mentioned was singing and/or dancing to Newsies, Beauty and the Beast, A Chorus Line, The King and I, Phantom of the Opera, The Music Man, The Sound of Music, Oklahoma, Into the Woods, songs from other obsession musicals of Chelsea's, and songs from the aforementioned shows.

Chelsea sighed as she walked past Jellylorum and Asparagus who were attempting to sing "It Takes Two". "Gus, Honey, you sing the tenor, NOT the mezzo soprano," Jelly explained to a very confused Asparagus. _This will be.....interesting..._Chelsea thought, chuckling at their attempts at harmonizing.

"Hey, Chel, what do you think of these harmonies?" Chelsea turned around to see Alonzo, a handsome black and white tom, standing in front of her. "Oh, hey 'Lonzo. Um, lemme hear it and I'll tell you what I think." He grinned, "Okay Quax, hit it!!!" As Quaxo began playing the piano and singing, and Alonzo, Mungojerrie, and Pouncival all joined in:

_We are the good guys, so nice and polite  
But bad guys beware us if you're lookin' to fight  
Cause we don't take no lip and we don't take no sass  
We're as tough as old shoe leather and as bold as brass  
We're the Starmites! The mighty Starmites!  
We fight for the right and unite to be free  
We're the Starmites! The mighty Starmites!  
The punks of the future, the future are we!  
  
We're the heroes, the good guys, the pack and the pips  
Gonna clean up the planet of bad guys and drips  
If you're lookin' for action join our pack, join our crew  
Cause we ain't never met a girl we like  
(half as much as you!)  
_

_Starmites! The mighty Starmites!_

_  
We fight for the right and unite to be free  
We're the Starmites! The mighty Starmites!  
The punks of the future, the future are we!  
  
Please forgive us, Damsel, if we ain't got no couth.  
We ain't never learned no manners,  
it's a sign of our youth.  
We all want you to like us so don't treat us like poison -  
You're the first genuine, in-the-flesh real live Damsel  
which we ever laid eyes on!  
We wanna protect you, respect you, elect you to our midst  
To woo you, ballyhoo you, and to do as you bidst!  
ALONZO: Roll call!  
QUAXO: Ack Ack Ackerman, at your service, Miss.  
MUNGOJERRIE: Herbie Harrison, at your service, Miss.  
POUNCIVAL: R-razzle Dazzledorf, at your mervis, sis - I  
mean, at your sissus, merve-  
I mean - aw forget about it!  
_

_Starmites! The mighty Starmites! _

_We fight for the right and unite to be free  
We're the Starmites! The mighty Starmites!  
The punks of the future, the future are we!  
_

_ALONZO:  
I am the Space Punk, the original Space Punk,  
The leader of the Pack; give me action, do or die!  
With a biff, bop, and a bam, I can rescue any damsel  
The king of the superheroes, I!_

Chelsea applauded enthusiastically, "Wow, guys, that sounded AWESOME!! 'Lonz, you make a great Spacepunk. You did all the parts perfectly!! Those are some tight harmonies, I'm impressed. This definitely counts towards your auditions. Keep it up!!" All four beamed at her. "Um Chel?! Help!!" She saw her two best friends, Arielle and Melissa, standing on the edge of the stage looking desperate. "Sorry guys, co-directors, costumers, choreographers and producers seem to need some help," she shrugged, glancing back at the stage where Melly and Arielle seemed to be arguing over something. "That's okay, Chels!!!" shrieked Pouncival in a hyperactive voice, "We can have indigestion with rubber ducks without you!!" he then proceeded into fits of giggles. Mungo, Quaxo, Alonzo and Chelsea, blinked stared, and cocked their heads before cracking up themselves. "OOKAY, looks like we've all had a _leeetle_ too much caffeine today....." Mungojerrie chuckled. "Okay Toms, you'd better go to the audition room. We're starting in 2 minutes." And with that, Chelsea jogged over to where Arielle and Melissa were standing.

"Okay, you two, what's wrong now?!" "Arielle _insists _that Tugger is a spring, when it's _SO blatantly obvious_ that he's a**_ FALL_**!!!" exclaimed an annoyed Melissa. "Blatantly obvious?!" Arielle yelled, "He's SO a winter!! He's black and tan!! SHEESH!!" Chelsea hit herself on the head...several times. "Tugger....." she moaned, "Get your ruff over here!!" Tugger strode over to where all three girls were standing. "Hey chicks, couldn't live a minute without the Tugger, eh?" "Tugger, no offense or anything, but SHUT IT." Snapped Chelsea, getting slightly annoyed with his self absorbedness, "Now please tell my two friends what season you are in colors." "I'm all four seasons and a whole lot more, baby," said Tugger, twirling her around leaning her back. "Tugger, you better not drop me....I'll give you ten seconds to put me back on my feet," Chelsea said, slightly exasperated. "Ten seconds..." Arielle drawled in her 'Tom Sawyer Teacher with a Monotone' voice, setting herself and Melissa into fits of giggles. "Fine, fine," He mumbled, propping her back up again. "Thanks." Tugger than proceeded to drape one arm around Chelsea's shoulder.

"Tugger......off. I don't like you in that way. Really." She sighed, taking a step away from him, "Besides, I have Quaxo!" she ran over and glomped Quaxo, who was sitting innocently on the piano bench playing "Once and For All" from Newsies. "Really, Chels, it's......okay." He said in a very confused and slightly scared voice as he tried to pry Chel off. "Quaxo....you're very fuzzy." She said in a muffled voice, being her face was buried in his shoulder at the moment. "Well...um...yeah. Being I'm a cat, that would make sense." Chelsea began giggling in a hyperactive sugar-rush type way. Tugger shrugged. "Help!!" Quaxo mouthed to Arielle and Melissa, who were standing close by.

"Come on Chelsea, time to go to the audition room." Said Arielle in her best attempt at a soothing voice (hey, it's hard to sound soothing when you're about to crack up because Quaxo's making a weird face!!) "Yeah, come on! We're seven and a half minutes behind schedule! We've go LOTS of auditions to judge." Melissa said, glancing at the clock. Chelsea began to loosen up. "And the sooner we finish the auditions," Arielle's face spread into an almost evil grin, "The sooner you can re-attach yourself to Quaxo!" Immediately, Chelsea jumped up and ran to the audition room.

Quaxo shot Arielle a horrified look, "What twisted thoughts are running through your head?!" She laughed maniacally, "Ohh, many. Mostly about Raphael. Sometimes other things. Depends, really." Melissa chuckled. "Looks like you're in for one heck of a day!!" she said and with that, she skipped off to join Chelsea in the audition room, followed by Arielle. Melissa emerged from the room a few seconds later carrying a megaphone. She spoke into it, "All persons to audition, make your way to the audition room. Best of luck to all of you. Let the auditions begin!!"

Running up to a person (or cat, in this instance) at full speed and hugging them rather tightly.

Author's Note So....that's the end of chapter one. Yay! Me love Quaxo. No, I'm not actually one of those crazed Misto/Jacob Brent fangirls, though I do like them (actually quite a lot). I prefer Quaxo to Misto anyway. I'm still more of a Mungo girl myself. And McCree O'Kelley, whom I love to pieces. I met him. Nice guy. He gave me a hug!! Alright, we're getting off track. So, R&R please!! Chapter 2 will be up soon!! (as well as the next chapter of my Pouncival fic) Virtual McCree hugs to all!!


End file.
